Leave it up to me

LEAVE IT UP TO ME.

By Jamila Annisette

Leave it up to me.

I would pick the phone up and dial yours

I will tell you that I love you

And I would want to say I never stopped and I always will

I won’t.

We live in a world that preaches “move on” and “you deserve better”

But then it releases you and you can’t seem to find it.

Leave it up to me.

I would come visit you for only two minutes

I would look at you, hold you and smell your skin scent

Time won’t be wasted on the words part of it

We live in a society that doesn’t support permanent

Because after all we are only temporary.

Leave it up to me.

I would forget (y)our past

I would live in the now and I would show you how much I’ve learned

Hoping that you would feel the same and see me as the better we all deserve

We live…. No we don’t. Well I am not

Because I have to not love you and love is living.

I’ll create a whole other world where you do not exist and then,

Only then will I be able to live.

Leave it to me, I would show you my love forever and a day.

21^st February, 2016

10:27pm

Conversation not Conversion

“Just shut up” why don’t you talk about “something else”

“I swear some of the things you say just make no sense”

Beliefs, righteousness, getting it right

My questions, thoughts, always starts a fight

Why can’t I question the traditions or norm?

Why can’t I learn about a new way or form?

Why don’t you want me to challenge my mind?

What is it out there that you think I’d find?

I’m not rebellious or trying to start trouble

I’m just on a journey, trying to get on another level

I want to know who I was created to be

I want to leave this earth with not a drop of talent left in me

I also want to do creatively what I feel

Without You feeling my beliefs are not real

I know I can’t be lukewarm; either hot or cold

But I really just want to see this world

I want to travel and feel and see and touch

I want to love and live and laugh so much

I pray that the good Lord guides my every step

Because He knows my heart and He knows its depth

I just want to please Him and live this one life right

I want to have these conversations without starting a fight. 

little man

Little man because that’s what you are.

Been here so long yet you haven’t reached very far

For you haven’t learned the real truths of your existence

Too busy getting caught up in your substance

The past, the past, oh we all have one

Either you stay there and wallow or forgive and move on

You couldn’t be good to me because he wasn’t good to you

Just a lame excuse from a little minded man like you

She fought for things and she did all she can

And all you did was complain, hurt us and demand

he has your mind and has you wrapped around the finger

he ain’t letting you go because you’re his main ring leader

My childhood I spent in fear and taking care of you

God knows that’s something a child shouldn’t do

Remember when I said I know what I want my husband to be like because of you

I hope you didn’t get my words confused, I had a different point of view

Because of you, I know exactly what I want

Someone loving, caring, kind, not arrogant

God fearing, respectful, honest and true

I want a husband the complete opposite of you

You left us stranded, not a call or a care

Finally! The first time I could live without constant fear

But thank you for this because I found my real Dad

He was there all along when things were bad

He is the real protector and provider

In your own home, you were the home wrecker

But I learned that you aren’t the enemy

And that I have to forgive to set myself free

Forgive and forget is something that I can do

Just always remember. That at least God loves you.

by JA